What Rae learned about her sucky prose, and why this makes her happy.

[raefinlay]

Prose Problems, catalogued:

PP1. Her beginnings suck with Teh Dense Stuffiness. This is because she starts off feeling insecure. Tonight, she cut two sentences out of paragraph two, simply because they were screaming at her: "RAAAEE! Look how pretty we are! We are trying soooooo hard!" chopchopchop

PP2. She over-explains. This is because she wants everyone to understand her story. Silly Rae. She should never write down to people. She should use her own level of reading sophistication as a guide. Would *you* understand that this is a thematic echo? Yes? Then don't surround it with flashing lights. Would *you* count up all the years looking for hidden significance? Yes? Then don't tell your readers to do it.

PP3. She has a cadence addiction. This is because she has a strong musical background. Although a nice trick when used sparingly, her entire prose piece should not be able to follow seamlessly after There once was a man from Nantucket...

PP4. She has an alliteration addiction. See PP3.

PP5. TBD

PP6. TBD

Why Rae is happy: She knows how to fix "Becoming."

Comments

[everyonesakitty.livejournal.com]

numa numa yay! *giggles*

[queenoftheskies.livejournal.com]

Congratulations!!! :)

[navicat.livejournal.com]

*shakes head*

I didn't know you had prose probelms.

[jmeadows.livejournal.com]

Dude, the zoo was just talking last night about over-explaining sensors and melodrama sensors and how they tend to go off early for the author of the piece (or sometimes never at all, but usually early). I suspect we could apply the same thing to cadence and alliteration. You're sensitive because

a) you know it's there
b) you know you do it a lot
c) you *like* it.

Well I got news for you. It worked for me. :P

Dude, email me--I gotta tell you somethin'.

[jmeadows.livejournal.com]

You're insane.

;)

[stillnotbored.livejournal.com]

Silly woman. Your prose is far from sucky. :: says the woman who forgets the conflict in pretty stories ::

[aaron-mag.livejournal.com]

She realizes she has a problem talking about herself in the third person and realizes she *needs* to get out more.

:P

heh heh heh

[wine-love-pen.livejournal.com]

If you suck, then I'm a Dyson.

[mmerriam.livejournal.com]

Rae, darlin', your prose is not sucky. In fact, if your prose is sucky, I should stop writing now before I embarrass myself even more.

That said, I'm glad you're figuring things out, and I'm glad you're feeling good about Becoming. I really enjoyed it when I read it, and I think it is a sellable piece.

Personally, I'm okay with the cadence. I think it works well with the short scenes. A good flowy cadence can help a reader be swept along, especially in a shorter piece.

M

[raecarson.livejournal.com]

Thx, u. Ok, maybe a better way of saying it is "suckier than I'd like it to be." *g*

And cadence is good. So long as the repetition doesn't pummel my readers like a drum.

[cricketshay.livejournal.com]

That's exactly what I was thinking.

[cricketshay.livejournal.com]

I would have to echo Jodi. :)

[cricketshay.livejournal.com]

I loved your story. One of my favorite things about it was when she switched names, she became that person complete with dialect and mannerisms.(does that make sense)

I keep meaning to go back through and try to review it for OWW.(been feeling icky)

Your prose is not sucky. I looked at your beautiful words and felt like I was in kindergarten. hehehhehehe I am a big fan of your style and voice. Keep it up. You will succeed. I'm sure of it.

[raecarson.livejournal.com]

Thx, u. *hugs* I needed the encouragement tonight, yanno?